Reminders

Duomo di Milano Saints and Blooming Magnolias byTamara

There are triple doors to the Cathedral of Milan, and over each door is an inscription.  Over one is carved a beautiful wreath of roses and underneath is the legend: “All that which pleases is but for a moment.”  Over another is a sculptured cross and underneath are these words: “All that which troubles is but for a moment.” And over the great central door are the words: “That only is important which is eternal.”

Our lives pass us by whether we are paying attention or not.  Oftentimes we can get caught up with the pursuit of happiness and all that pleases us. It could be as simple as reading a book or having a cup of tea. Or doing things that make us dig deep into our pockets such as having pricey dinners or going on expensive vacations. Pleasure. Or to go baser -- indulging in sinful pleasures such as having an affair or having one drink too many. 

Then there are life's troubles which we cannot escape. Whatever happens to visit upon us. These, like the former have their own expiration dates...transitory as they are. The pleasures many times we regret  ending, while our troubles we scarcely can wait for that which seems like a sentence passed to be served and to receive our release papers. I remember another Buddhist proverb that goes "All things pass. Everything does." My good friends and i (we, who have fought one battle too many) had our picture taken by the sign outside a Buddhist temple that carried this message in one of our out of town trips.

I must sear in my mind the central door's inscription which reminds me not to get too attached to those that are temporary but to that which has eternal value. Only these matter in the end.

Turning a New Leaf

Photo by Aksveer

Once i was mulling over a plant's big scar tissue where a twig or branch once was. A closer look and i saw a very fresh, and tender sprout bravely shooting its way out. I thought that the plant must have gone through some pain pruning first before it burst forth with new life.

Truly as i reflect on the process of growth i realize that  there are necessary losses, essential struggles for us to evolve towards our best self. Leaving behind or deciding to cut off what one had been used to hurts. Yet they are choices we need to make to move forward. Many times events act as tipping points that leave us no other recourse but to shift.

Turning a new leaf may mean relocating, making new friends, or  moving to a new job. The hardest part is the daily decision to choose goodness (the opposite of all our baser tendencies).

When you happen to stop and smell the flowers, notice how growth is being spoken. Each day is an invitation.

Splash of Roses

Lucy Liu's dress at the 70th Annual Golden Globe Awards

"Lucy Liu's gown is like Halloween, you either love it or hate it. While we are in the latter column, blinded by a flashback to grandma's kitchen wallpaper, there was plenty of Twitter love for the risky Carolina Herrera gown, especially among fashion critics who applauded Liu's bravery on the red carpet." -- MSN

I  love it!

Refreshing, non-traditional, whimsical, brave.

It shows both designer and wearer's chutzpah,  self-confidence and unorthodox ways, being true to themselves whilst keeping that elegance. I'm pretty sure that after gown after gown of traditional design here came an outfit that gave one's eyes a respite from sameness. 

Even the spirit is given a lift, a whiff of inspiration, and some shift to playful mood. 

We all need to break away from the monotony from time to time and disengage from the usual. So shake things up and do something novel.

Hugging Our Tree

Trunk of an old Yew Tree
oil on canvas
Van Gogh 1888

“Tell me about your family," I said. And so she did. I listened intently as my mother went through each branch of the tree. Years later, after the funeral, Maria had asked me questions about the family - who was related to whom - and I struggled. I couldn't remember. A big chunk of our history had been buried with my mother. You should never let your past disappear that way.” ― Mitch Albom, For One More Day

Last week I took myself to task to create a Facebook Group for me and my cousins...actually,  a product of a conversation between my two eldest cousins on my father's side after one of them began asking about the names of the kids one generation down. It's funny how when  the branches move further and further away from the roots, our knowing, our relationships...our lives seem somewhat disassociated from each other. My children do not have a relationship with my cousins' children. They would not know they are connected by blood if they bumped into each other on the street.

In a recent trip to Baguio it just felt so wonderful to connect with my cousins. I can not count the many colorful stories we share growing up, spending those summers and Christmases together.

The Tree Hugger
by
Angela Ferreira

Since i am not that much of a techie, it took me awhile to figure out some kinks (privacy settings for a myriad of privacy issues) that needed to be ironed out. Many in the branches are not Facebook "friends," let alone actual friends.  It is quite toxic trying to get things running smoothly and making sure that no one gets offended. But the pleasure of evoking beautiful memories is worth it.

We love looking at the uploaded old photos that remind us of the halcyon days of youth...blissful, nostalgic. And sad, too because of the many different roads each of us has taken, and the handful of folk no longer with us. Much as it can retrieve good stuff from the past,  it can also dredge up ugly scenes etched in  memory, hopefully blurred by time. 

“I was thinking how complicated life is and how there are no simple roads or paths. We are a fabric of mistakes and hurts; a family tree of fumbled attempts, successes and failures.” 
― Belinda Jeffrey, One long Thread

"Don't break my heart," my good old grandfather used to tell each one of us. I wonder how many times it has been broken into many little pieces. I hope all those have faded into a blur as well.

Whatever has been sewn into the fabric of our lives --- we belong to each other and go back to the same roots at least, of one of our two parents. In my heart a hug goes out to that big old trunk that is our family tree.

Reverie

Was spring cleaning the other day and classified a big box of photos, putting together those i thought had a theme.  Relatives on Dad's side, one pile. Relatives on Mom's side, another pile. Photos of my children, pile three. Vacations, pile four. And on and on and on. Here's how i grouped this particular set i am sharing with you: Mommy and her love affair with flowers.

Mommy always had a thing for plants. Especially flowers.

Mom, taken at my lolo's house in Baguio during her honeymoon

In one of her trips out of the country (not sure if this was in San Francisco or Canada)

In La Trinidad, Benguet with me and my brother

 And here are some snapshots taken by her...

For what i thought was to be just some menial task turned out to be one whole afternoon of sifting not just through piles of photos but also through memories both  happy and sad. I had to pause every so often for those images in the mind... the voices, the faces, the laughter, the tears.

Happy Birthday in advance, Mommy! Hope you are enjoying all the flowers God has set in heaven.